What could you do VLAD?
It seemed only a matter of time before UKRAINE was accepted into NATO, and that would not do at all. You could make up some Weak Excuse about UKRAINIAN PROVOCATION. However, BEING THE AGGRESSOR NATION ATTACKING A FELLOW MEMBER WOULD MEAN A GREAT DEAL OF INVESTIGATION BY OTHER COUNTRIES, AND YOU WOULD BE EXPOSED. NATO would probably come down hard on your regime, with harsh penalties and sanctions.
So you had to act soon. How could you block, or at least delay membership long enough to put your plans for invasion in motion? Who could help you do that? Did someone mention a certain AMERICAN MILLIONAIRE, WHO FOR YEARS HAD BEEN TRYING TO ESTABLISH A LUXURY HOTEL IN MOSCOW, WITH HIS NAME CLEARLY VISIBLE ON THE BUILDING FOR ALL TO SEE?
Perhaps you learned about how this SELF-CENTERED EGOMANIAC, WHOSE MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT WAS STARRING IN SOME SCRIPTED "REALITY" TV SHOW THAT WAS LITTLE MORE THAN A TRANSPARENT ATTEMPT TO MAKE MONEY ON EXPLOITING HIS ENORMOUS EGO, could be used in the one way that might force NATO to back off any actions or repercussions that might occur if you decided to seize control of UKRANIAN TERRITORY. At the very least, he could make sure that possible UKRANIAN MEMBERSHIP IN NATO could be derailed for the near future.
So how could we get this man elected PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES? It probably sounded absurd at first, BUT THEN THE GRU MAPPED OUT A SCENARIO...
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